To start off this week, let’s define what we really want. So many people go through their lives trying to figure out the answer to this question. They say they want certain things, only to get what they want and find it was not really what they wanted after all. I thought about all the times I chased dreams and goals then, after reaching them, found they really brought dissatisfaction. So let us use the minds we have to really think through what it is we want. This post is about thinking in depth about what you truly want, not just a moment of “sounds good, let’s do it,” but true joy and fulfillment.
I think back to a person who once said, “I just want to be happy.” The truth is you cannot be happy all the time. Happiness if a feeling, it is something you get for a moment then once the feeling is gone you lose your happiness. A few years back the story of Chris Gardner was in the movies. He stated that the constitution gives us the right to the Pursuit of Happiness. He made the statement in the film how the pursuit of it could be something, but that they could not guarantee happiness. It was only possible to pursue it not achieve it. This could be a confusing thought, the movie shows him at the beginning having tried a number of things that failed, then moves through to the end where the choices he ultimately made still did not give him what he desired in life.
Think of the artist or the musician who loves to play, loves to write songs, and just get up anywhere to play them to a crowd of any size. That person lives a life of pursuit of happiness. They find true joy in that time on the stage; that small moment is worth all the hours of practice in a dingy garage. It’s worth the daily part of their life where they work a menial job just to keep a bed in a small room, and pour all the extra money they have into buying equipment to play with.
In my own life there are two things and the choices they brought that I live with and that make me happy. One is being an entrepreneur; this means great things to me. I get to choose what I want to do to better myself; I love thinking of ways to better life and things in my life. A true entrepreneur loves to create ideas and processes. It’s like an art form. Of course, like the musician, it could involve a life of living without a lot of things that I get to see my friends have. But I don’t want things in life; I want the life itself. That is why I choose this life.
The other thing in my life that brings me happiness is that I choose to ride a Harley everywhere. I love bikes; I love to ride, to tell you about all the great trips I take, the fun places you see in my pictures. But it has a down side. Last summer I rode through Yellowstone in a driving rain for four hours behind a motor home and line of cars at 35 miles per hour; it was no fun on a bike. When you have to get up and be at a meeting and it’s raining outside, a bike is not all fun. The fact that I must go today to get new tires, and that I must do this twice a year at $800 a shot isn’t always fun. But I chose the lifestyle with its ups and downs. I know of only about five people in my life who truly operate a bike all the time. My partner and I are the hardest core in that we really ride everywhere.
So what I am getting at in this post is this: what do you really want? I want you to think of the lifestyle that goes along with what you believe you want, with that choice. Think about the good, the bad and the ugly of your choice. Really search for the life style you want, not just having something that gives you credit or a pat on the back. Think what it is you really want. I have seven questions I want you to answer to help determine what you want. Use these answers to direct you to that true life you want.
- If you had to live your life with no money, no job, no place to call home, what would you do?
- What would you be willing to give up to reach that one dream or goal you said you wanted?
- If money were no object, what is the one place you would give it, donate it?
- What hobby could you see yourself doing over and over each day with no income from it?
- Name one time you actually were able to see things through and get what you wanted?
- What was the feeling you received when you actually got it?
- Are you still enjoying what is was you wanted?
As this week goes on I will ask you more questions. Keep a note pad to think through each answer you give. Then when Saturday comes along, see if you were able to solve these questions using your own thinking. I want to leave you today with a poem that I heard years ago, one from Jesse Rittenhouse :
I bargained with Life for a Penny, and Life would pay no more,
However, I begged at evening, when I counted my scanty store.
For Life is a just employer, He will give you what you ask,
But once you have set the wages, why, you must bear the task.
I worked for a menial’s hire, only to learn, dismayed,
That any wage I had asked of Life, Life would have willingly paid.
Here’s to a great week of changing your mindset. I’m Tim Gillette, the Rocker Life Coach. It’s time to Live the life you always wanted, by Loving what you do and those around you. How can we help you become the RockStar in your world?