Start With the Man in the Mirror

Start With the Man in the Mirror

It’s hard to believe that next month it will be three years since we lost Michael Jackson. While he was most known in his last years for eccentric behavior and things he was accused of, I remember him most for his songs from my young teenage years, songs like “Billy Jean,” “Thriller,” and “Bad.” The song that I would say gave me the most to think about would be “Man in the Mirror.”

It’s hard to believe a man who wrote a song about looking in the mirror and making the changes you need to do for yourself, was a man who was accused of so many things. I’m not here to say he is guilty, or to say that he is innocent either. We all will forever hold our opinions of what he did or didn’t do – the same as we will think of OJ and what happened there.

In our lives we are going to make mistakes; we are going to screw up, we are going to fail. It’s what you learn from life when you are down that makes you the strongest. And after you make bold statements like Michael did in his song, “Man in the Mirror,” you will be held to a higher level by those who watch you.

But if you want the world to change you have to make the changes to yourself first. How many will take that look in the mirror to see what has to be changed in themselves before asking others to help change the world?

This week’s theme is about how real change has to start with one person and that person is you. Yes you have screwed up, yes those who are close to you will likely be the first to point it out. Still you make the change to make the world better by first starting to make yourself better.

Many people who come to me for coaching want the changes to happen in life, but do not want to do the work to make those changes happen. True change is a long-term job; you don’t make a change in your life and find that your world suddenly gets better. You make a change, and then you get up the next day and practice that change, sometimes over and over again for years before you are rewarded.

I have said before in my blogs about how the bamboo tree experiences its greatest growth years after it was planted. Think of your garden: if you plant a seed to grow a tomato plant, it does not give you tomatoes the next day.

We just planted a few tomato plants in pots on our balcony at the house. Gwynne put them in about a month ago and they are getting close to a foot tall. We do not have tomatoes from them yet, but we still water them, check on them. By the middle of summer, we will have some great tomatoes to eat. Gwynne’s father planted several grape vines a couple of years ago. Some of them will bear fruit this year but some of them will need to go another season before they produce. And he continues to tend them, knowing it takes time and nurturing.

So many people expect life to give them the fruit right away, but it takes time. To get that fruit you have to plant the seed of change in your life. Take care of the change; water and make it grow in your life. It takes a growing season to harvest what you want. For tomatoes it is a few months, for other things in life it may be a few years.

So what changes are you going to make today? This morning, if you looked in your mirror, you probably took the time to make sure your hair was fixed; you made sure you washed your face. Do this with your life; look into the mirror of who you are and see what is needed to make the change to bring you to that life you want to live. Make a list of what you see that needs to be changed, then start with a plan to live it. Michael Jackson wrote the song, but that didn’t end the change; and after that, he had to live it. He stood out to make a difference when he sang the song;, after that came the hard part.

I’m Tim Gillette, the Rocker Life Coach. It’s time to live your dream, to love what you do and those you share life with. Look in the mirror and make the real change that takes you to being RockStar in your world.

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